5 minutes to a better relationship: Lori Gottlieb on love, attachment, and chemistry

In this short video, psychotherapist and bestselling author Lori Gottlieb — an Ash advisor — answers quickfire questions about love and relationships: why men and women open up differently, what "daddy issues" really are, and whether she believes in happily ever after.

• Beneath the surface, everyone is really asking the same thing — "how can I love and be loved, and what's getting in the way?" The difference between men and women is how openly they talk about it, not the questions themselves.
Gottlieb's most common "edit" to people's stories: flesh out the other person's perspective — seeing the other character's thoughts and feelings often reframes the whole conflict.
• "Mommy/daddy issues" are really attachment patterns: we tend to "marry our unfinished business," repeating dynamics that leave us feeling the way we did as children — until we work through them.
• As people address that history, what once felt like "no chemistry" can change — chemistry isn't fixed.

Begin your journey

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ACKNOWLEDGMENT

Ash is not designed to be used in crisis. If you are in crisis, please seek out professional help, or a crisis line. You can find resources at www.findahelpline.com.

Begin your journey

Take the first step today

ACKNOWLEDGMENT

Ash is not designed to be used in crisis. If you are in crisis, please seek out professional help, or a crisis line. You can find resources at www.findahelpline.com.

Begin your journey

Take the first step today

ACKNOWLEDGMENT

Ash is not designed to be used in crisis. If you are in crisis, please seek out professional help, or a crisis line. You can find resources at www.findahelpline.com.